"Anonymous?"

 November 23, 2023

Today I was reading through a social media post about tipping restaurant servers, drivers, and others providing a service. I have mixed feelings about this and can see the argument on both sides. 

On one hand, I know that people work so much harder at jobs than I'll ever know. I've learned that none of us understand what it's like to be each other, and so I can't speak to the struggles, nor the successes, of another person. As I was reading the anonymous post from a service worker, I tried to imagine their frustration and constantly working for low wages and then having people short change them when it came time to tip. I don't know if it's true, but I have heard from several sources, that Utahns are especially bad tippers and that makes me sad, if it's true. Of course, none of these generalized criticisms levied against a whole group are true for all members of that group, but I fear that they might be true for too many people. I decided to read through some of the replies to the comment, and noticed one in particular, which simply replied: "Anonymous?" as if to question the validity of the original poster's unwillingness to own the post. I shake my head at that because I understand. Posting something in a community that criticizes the group can lead to social ostracization. People in the community will lash out at the person leading to less tips. Putting ourselves in the shoes of the poster might help to see how such a bold post must come anonymously. People, in general, don't like to be criticized and so they will turn petty when they feel their position challenged.

On the other hand, I think the expectations of tips has become too prevalent and that the assumption to tip has almost become synonymous with the actual cost of the service or product itself. If I sit down at a restaurant, then my server is giving me a friendly face and bringing food and filling up beverages and checking on me and my party; there is a great deal of extra work that goes into that, than just the food that I've ordered. If I order a soda or a coffee from a drive-up window, and the person that is working is making my drink that might take them 1-2 minutes, what is the expectation there? I personally feel obligated to tip. For example, at Dutch Bros, when I order and pay with the app, there is a place for me to customize a tip and I always do. Is that the same thing as a restaurant server? Disturbingly, my daughter worked for a local soda shop. She told me that when people tip through credit cards, and not cash, that the owners of the company kept those tips! If that's true, I am appalled! To offer a tip option, most of us would think that the tips are going to the workers. With a company possibly keeping some of the tips, then I start to think that I'm just paying more to pad the pockets of the owners who are somewhat exploiting both myself and their workers behind the guise of a tip for good service. I also question whether or not drivers to deliver groceries should be tipped. The store offers a service to drive groceries to my house. Does that store expect me to pay the wages of the person driving, through tips, even though I pay extra money to have that option?